I was recently dating someone. I say dating, it was like having a friend who you wasn’t really sure was in to you or not. Come to think of it, it would be unfair to call it dating. It was probably better termed as ‘confusion’.
In the confusion, I’d actually come to like said person. It felt like there was a ray of sunshine on the otherwise quite uncertain climate of my life, albeit without the guarantee that a full blown suny day would occur at any point. But I was optimistic.
Then he vanished. It’s called ghosting. I took a few days to realise that something dreadful hadn’t happened to him, he just hadn’t wanted to ever see or speak to me again all after making plans to come for dinner just a few days earlier.
So when, after a couple of weeks of wondering how the heck I’d managed to fudge that one up, I was asked on a date by someone else, I figured it would be a good idea to get my head away from confusion and move on.
This was the result:
Today I went on a date. It went so well I thought I should share the very best parts of how I did it, so that you too can experience dating joy.
G – me
MS – male species
MS: So you have your own business?
G: I do. I have four businesses but they are all friends.
MS: Four? Wow….And one is the kids thing.
G: It is. That’s the busiest one!
MS: So there’s a couple of people helping you with that one?
G: Yes. There’s 4 staff in the office and 39 franchisees.
MS: Oh. Wow. So who’s in charge of all that?
G: I am?!
MS: Wow. That must be a lot to take on.
G: I always say ‘there’s only one thing worse than being the boss.’
MS: What’s that?
G: Not being the boss.
MS: I have to say I find you quite intimidating.
G: Ahhh Thank you!
G: Opps. That wasn’t a compliment was it? I mean, I’m sorry you feel that way….
Soooo we’re not going to do a second date are we?
MS: I errr, it’s erm –
G: Use your words.
MS: We’re both very busy people.
G: Yes, this is true. I need to get home and do my washing because I’ve run out of knickers – again!
MS: I’m going to leave now.
G: It was smashing to have met me. I mean you. YOU! I mean it was really smashing to meet you.
These guidelines will be helpful to those of you who are new to dating or those of you who feel your style has become a little stale. I am available for other great dating advice by request.